Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing Now? Why Gen Z Is Hiding Their Relationships

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by

Teaya Brownstacker
in

This isn’t my usual content, but I wanted to add to the conversation. Remember when posting your boyfriend on Instagram was the ultimate flex?
Matching flannels, pumpkin patch selfies, that one “soft launch” photo of your hands at dinner, those days might be behind us.

Vogue recently dropped an article asking, “Is having a boyfriend embarrassing now?” and honestly, they might be onto something.

Because somewhere between “main character energy” and “hot girl walks,” having a boyfriend started to feel a little… uncool. Let’s unpack that.

From Chicago Love Stories to Florida Girl Realities

Back in Chicago, having a boyfriend was practically an accessory. Like a deep-dish pizza or a Cubs hat, everyone had one, and it was kind of expected.

Fast forward to Florida, and suddenly everyone’s soft-launching boyfriends like they’re limited-edition Stanley cups, cute, but maybe not for public display.

It’s not that relationships are out of style. It’s that the vibe around them has changed.

The Internet Made “Single” the New Status Symbol

Single doesn’t mean sad anymore. It means self-aware, busy, and thriving.

We’re in an era where self-love, self-care, and “that girl” routines have replaced “relationship goals.”
Being single means you’re choosing yourself. You can travel, flirt, take mirror selfies at golden hour, no compromises, no coordinating schedules.

And if you do have a boyfriend? People might assume you’ve lost your edge, like the second you post a pic together, your follower count drops. (And yes, Vogue pointed out that’s actually happening.)

So, are people embarrassed to have a boyfriend? Or just embarrassed to look like the girl whose whole personality is her boyfriend?

Why It Feels “Embarrassing” Now

Nobody wants to be “that girl.” The one whose captions go from “Hot girl era” to “His forever” overnight.
But this embarrassment isn’t about love, it’s about optics.

1. We’re living in hyper-independent times.

Gen Z and Millennials were raised on “boss babe” culture. We’re told to chase dreams, stack savings, and be independent. Having a boyfriend can look like a distraction, even when it’s not.

2. Social media turned relationships into performance art.

Once you post, people start analyzing:
Who liked it?
Why didn’t he comment?
Did she delete him?
Now your relationship is content, and content gets judged.

3. “Cringe” culture is undefeated.

If TikTok decides something is cringe, it’s over. And right now, overt relationship posts are deep in the cringe danger zone.

But Here’s the Plot Twist

Having a boyfriend isn’t embarrassing. What’s embarrassing is pretending you don’t have one just to seem more interesting.

We’ve entered an era where authenticity is everything. So if you’re in a happy, healthy relationship, why hide it?
The trick is keeping your individuality while being in love.

You can post your partner and your solo wins. You can love someone and love your life.

You can be the girlfriend who still has her own hobbies, ambitions, and girls’ nights.
Because let’s be honest, no one wants to follow a couple’s joint account called LoversInParadise2025.

So, What’s the Real Answer?

No, having a boyfriend isn’t embarrassing.
But losing yourself in one? Maybe a little.

Here’s the cheat sheet:

  • Post him if you want to. Just don’t make it your entire brand.
  • Share what feels genuine, not performative. Let your relationship be something you enjoy, not something you market.
  • Stay grounded in who you are. A relationship should add to your story, not become the whole plot.
  • Keep parts of your love life offline. Privacy can make something feel more real.
  • Be proud of who you’re with, but even prouder of who you are.

Because confidence, whether single or taken, will always be trending.

Final Thought

If you’re in a relationship, own it. If you’re single, celebrate it. The only thing embarrassing is caring too much about how other people see your happiness.

Maybe the real question isn’t, “Is having a boyfriend embarrassing?”
It’s, “Am I living my life for me or for the internet?”

And if your answer is “for me,” then you’re doing just fine.

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